June 4th, 2016 turned out to be a good day for Chris to leave his declining body. Suffering from ALS and no longer able to swallow, the long-awaited end came quickly. Chris was surrounded by family and friends these last few days. He gave up the ghost before dawn at home in the arms of his beautiful wife in the bed he made by hand, and was buried on the Farewell Trail just up the driveway from their house.
MORNING CHORES
It always amazes us how people survive great adversity. Alisa came out to sit with Tami while she milked the community goats, with her rainbow mug, hours after witnessing Chris’ last breath. And Tami continues finding ways to love her life despite losing her oldest son seven weeks ago. Yet, the animals need tended, kids need fed, the mundane details of daily life become the lifeline that keeps them going.
BOTTLE BABE
When Tami was done milking both nannies, she fed the little orphan kid. Babies are a beautiful reminder that life goes on.
FAMILY SUPPORT
Alisa’s father Chuck and Karen drove out from Illinois to help with housework and be with the kids. Eden works on a project with her grandpa.
THE TROUTS
We came to help with yard work.
DIGGERS
Lyle broke ground on Chris’s grave while Luke and his son Demetrius planted grapes in Alisa’s back yard.
PREPARING FOR A WAKE
Chad and his brother finished making Chris’ casket and moved it into the house with help from Jason and Joe. Alisa set up a shrine which included her Nana’s white kitty music box. About an hour after Chris passed, Alisa was startled to hear the song of the music box playing. And it wasn’t just a couple of notes, it played for a minute or longer. Most everyone in the house was still asleep and later averred no one had wound up the music box. Gina heard it too, a clear sign from Chris that he had reached the other side. He had promised he would send a sign if he could and there was no other explanation for the box to spontaneously play its tune.
CARRYING CHRIS
To the beat of drums, Chris was brought out under the oaks for one last bonfire.
BONFIRE
Alisa looks on as her three children light the fire for their father’s last wish. He asked for one last fire and Alisa made sure he got it.
TREE OF LIFE
Under the spreading oaks, the young in our community learned about death. It is not so scary. It happens to us all.
Chris was returned to his bedroom to rest up for tomorrow’s funeral.
BURIAL JUNE 5TH
The next afternoon, Chris was loaded into the back of the ‘pup’ the very same truck which carried Zafer to his final resting place. Lyle drove him down the lane to the Farewell Trail. Words were said, dirt was thrown and later shoveled into the grave until the mound of red clay was moved.
FAREWELL TRAIL OF TEARS
Funerals, like weddings stir up all feelings associated with the ritual. When Chris’s son Noah took his turn filling in the hole, Camille and Buffy were overcome with sadness and left the group to pay their respects to Zafer in his nearby grave. Noah had lost his father, and Lyle his son. It was beyond tragic.
Camille regards Chris’ passing on her birthday as the perfect gift. Long plagued by fear of seeing a dead person to the point of recurring corpse dreams, spending time with Chris on her birthday showed her that death was not as scary as she once thought. She wrote about her experience on Plastic Farm Animals in The Not-so-grim Reaper